strange but harmless.

Soundtrack of Shame: SoS #17

yelahneb — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 02:36:14 +0000

Poison Bell Biv Devoe / No One Is To Blame Howard Jones

Tear In Your Hand Tori Amos / Cerulean Ocean Blue

Fumbling Towards Ecstasy Sarah McLachlan / Possession Sarah McLachlan

Kiss Off Violent Femmes / Life During Wartime Talking Heads

Heaven or Las Vegas Cocteau Twins / Walking In My Shoes Depeche Mode

Heart and Soul Huey Lewis and the News / Criminal Fiona Apple

Two Hearts Beat As One U2 / The Crying Game Boy George

Angels of the Silences Counting Crows / No Way Pearl Jam

Young Lust Pink Floyd / Down In It Nine Inch Nails

Fascination Street The Cure / Everybody Knows Leonard Cohen

moving in stereo

yelahneb — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 23:42:21 +0000

unicorns! mars! d&d! i actually enjoy getting associated with these sorts of things. though sometimes i worry that i don’t “do” these things often or deeply enough to justify the tags. so much of it goes on in my head, where others (i assume) cannot see it - but then, i’m not much one for a distinctive “inner” and “outer” voice - i kinda just say what’s on my mind as i’m thinking it, much to the continuing amusement/annoyance/alarm of my lovely wife.

like this “blog” for instance. i write random crap when i feel like it, while she carefully constructs regular missives that target a specific audience and theme. she’d never ramble on about coffee, science and fetishes like, um, i just did. i don’t know if there’s an intrinsic value to either approach - i’m just aware of mine, which is not so much an approach as a mad dash towards the exit. and i’m not certain this is really anything more than masturbation on my part, the kind few want to hear about and none want to witness.

that being said, i maintain a desire this space to *be* something more than what it is. so far, any related energy goes toward flickr and related photo projects, so maybe there needs to be more a bridge in that regard. i blogged with random precision for about five years on secret city, but it petered out somehow after a brief surge (which coincided with my unemployment in the early stages of 2007), as circle of irony has. i’m not giving up, though - i just need to find some focus, and decide what i want this to be, exactly. stay tuned.

news from 2012

yelahneb — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 08:01:42 +0000

welcome to a new age of enlightenment and understandiWHASSUP THREE EYES

i wish somebody would do something about how needy i am

yelahneb — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 19:38:46 +0000

i would have already assigned myself to having this all end in tears, if not for two things: one, “this” will never end; two, i barely know what “this” is.

into white

yelahneb — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 07:50:38 +0000

is he going to do it? yes and it will be invisible, as promised. now drink your tea. no more questions until the intermission.

swallow

yelahneb — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 11:00:38 +0000

how’s the old heart today? oh just great fucker thanks so goddamn much for asking

DONT TRY TO FRONT A BROTHER WITH A HEART OF STEEL I GOTS CLANKITYCLANK I AIN’T EVEN USED now that we’ve gotten that out of the way i think it’s time we ~~had sex~~ SMILE AND NOD

don’t think this changes anything. mine didn’t come with any instructions either but you don’t hear me flappin on like a fuckin idiot about some secret pain that NO-ONE-IN-THE-HISTORY-OF-PAIN-HAS-EVER-FELT. get over YOUR GODDAMNSELF ALREADY thx.

[The camera whirs for another 20 seconds or so of awkward silence, then stops with a subdued click. The audience begins to file out almost immediately, looking more relieved than confused.]

this magic moment

yelahneb — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 06:10:26 +0000

awoke to snow. waited at the stop for a time, noticed with some pleasure the white beauty of what would otherwise been a gray morning. not as cold as the previous week, despite the lovely seven days blue. on the bus, round the cow-clad corner, then stopped just long enough to witness a little birthday through the window, six employees gathered round one, cake and candlefire then blown, applause, and we roll on. later, a woman steps off the bus, hesitates in tiny panic, calling out for her lost glove. i turn behind, just in time to see fourteen riders lean forward in unison, all searching and sleepy eyed, each determined to be the fifteen second hero. over the bridge, and the snow is absent from the warm downtown city streets, sewers, sidewalks. down, down past the ziggurat of knowledge, the tower of protest, to the stop of ben. i pause on the corner, taking in the cold air, hooded and green overcoat, mask over disguise over mirror, happy in this moment, however short, however fleet of foot.

an unexpected surprise

yelahneb — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 07:57:29 +0000

your contributions have been noted. i will count slowly down from ten. can you feel anything when i do this? both terrible and wonderful. we’re closing our borders but opening our hearts. unto the fourth generation. this is the same sort of nonsense we’ve become accustomed to from the likes of you. our profound disappointment is matched only by our deep distrust. please have your desk cleared by midday.

signal to noize

yelahneb — Thu, 19 Apr 1979 23:28:44 +0000

>>>>>WE_ARE_RECEIVING_YOUR_SIGNAL_OBSERVER42

after these years, finally, i receive confirmation!

>>>>>CONTINUE_YOUR_MISSION_FOR_THERE_IS_MUCH_ABOUT_HUMANS_ WE_MUST_KNOW

yesyesyes i will i never doubted my origins i will continue to observe and learn and report

>>>>>MARS_NEEDS_TO_UNDERSTAND_WOMEN

and… wait, what?

>>>>>ALSO_WHATS_ WITH_THE_HAIR

well played sir.

yelahneb — Sat, 26 Apr 1969 15:16:36 +0000

i imagine you think you’ve won this round. however i have a few more tricks up my sleeve. is this not a day of independence? and the day is young, little white god. i shall be free of you yet. remember this moment, for humankind will mark it as the Crossroads, the Turning Point, the end of Before and the beginning of After. this i vow. now pass the mashed carrots; i grow hungry.